Step Eight

The Eighth Step in the Recovery Journey

8. Compile a List of All Individuals We Have Harmed and Cultivate the Willingness to Make Amends with Everyone

Up until this point, the steps have been guiding us towards a profound humility that we might not have previously imagined: A humility in the presence of God and His children that truly liberates us to exist in the radiant light of the spirit. By acknowledging our lack of power — and taking steps to access that power — we now need to humble ourselves before it and rectify the disruptions we've caused in others' lives. There's no space for ego. No room for pride. No place for "me." Just God.

By relying solely on our own strength, we would neither agree nor initiate the process of making amends, to contribute to, remove from, or rectify our wrongdoings. However, with the willingness that only God can provide, we can confront those we've been avoiding, blaming, and holding grudges against for years.

I've got my list. My sponsor provided it to me following my fifth step. But do I possess the willingness? Am I ready to go to any extent to conquer addiction? If I wish to lead a liberated life, I must. Thus, I pray. I meditate. I seek the willingness to humble myself. To confront the person I deceived, manipulated, and misled, and confess my error. To inquire how my actions affected them. To ensure nothing is overlooked. To discover what I can do to rectify the situation. To be prepared to go to any length for triumph over addiction. And as willingness gradually emerges, fear is expelled. As I place my trust in God, all uncertainties vanish.

As God enters, I step aside. Then more God in, more of me out. And then the courage born from grace propels me, launches me, into the subsequent step. The 9th step. The step when I reunite with God’s children. But this all stems from humbly requesting God for the willingness to make amends. Humbly acknowledging that without God, I am nothing.

– Anonymous